merry christmas!

hope you all have a beautiful holiday~<3<3<3  


we're having a dinner at our apartment again with good friends.  i am looking forward to it.  but i am also glad that this is the last christmas in seoul.  it will be great to be home next year with everyone.  


happy christmas!

from last may on the cheonggyecheon stream.  i wonder where she's going...

goals, old & new

the other day i browsed the archives of this blog, looking back on the first three months i lived here.  i arrived december 26, 2005.  it will be four years at the end of the month.  i can't believe it.  

looking back at those first few months, it's fascinating to see how positive i was.  what do i remember about then?  i remember fear.  crying-at-night-before-bed fear.  i remember excitement.  such excitement!  it was intoxicating, being in a new place that was so different from home.  it changed the way i think.  i remember how much i loved to travel, how i couldn't wait to get out and explore.  mostly, i remember wanting so badly to grow and change and get over myself.  


it was funny to read my goals, stated in my second ever post.  did i meet them?  let's see...


1.  "I want to live somewhere besides the Midwest, USA before I die."   um..... yes. 


2.  "I want exposure to other cultures."    another yes.   i've lived in seoul.  in addition to previous travels, since moving to seoul i've been to hong kong, macau, nearly all of southeast asia, tokyo, and all over south korea.  i've had exposure. ...though, in-depth exposure?  only in seoul, and that is tempered by my foreigner, forever-an-outsider status.


3.  "I want to become a better risk taker."   yes and no.  i did become better after my first two years.  last year i regressed.  this year i am hoping to grow again.


4.  "I want to eat good kimchee [sic] every day."   well....  i don't eat kimchi every day.  i have, however, learned how to spell it in english.  ~lol~  and i always have a tub in the fridge, just in case.


5.  "I want to see someone I look like -- not in the harharallasianslookalike way, but someone I truly look like."   this is a tough one.  i haven't seen anyone that i think i look like.  however, i've found that many of the adoptees i've met here say they haven't seen people that they think they look like, which has been comforting.    and it makes sense.  it's not like all koreans actually do look alike. ~lol~

on a side note, it's been fascinating seeing race relations here - living in a place where asians are the majority yet i've thought of them as a minority all my life.  it's eye opening to see the ways majorities are similar no matter where you live.  but, i digress.  will talk about this in another post.  back to goals.

6.  "I want to be able to save some of my salary."    i did save some. then i spent it.  then i saved it.  then i spent it.  so i guess this one is a yes, because i was able to save some.  and now i'll save some more. and then spend it.  ~lol~

so, those were my goals four years ago.  what are my goals now, for the last year in seoul?

well, we have a wedding and an expensive visa to pay for, so saving is a definite goal again.~^^

i failed at learning to speak korean last year, not only in not learning the language as well as i wanted but also in allowing it to affect my self-confidence.  now that i've had some distance, i'd like to study again this year, at a much slower pace, and put less pressure on myself to do well.

i'd also like to get a better grip on my fear of making mistakes.  i made a lot of progress my first two years here, then lost major ground last year.  i think this year will be much better.

i want to grow as a photographer and continue learning how to cook korean food.  i discovered a love of photography after moving here.  taking pictures has also changed the way i look at the world.  and learning to cook korean food will help ease the transition back to life at home when i'm really missing korea, the way i miss home right now.

last, i'd like to enjoy this year as much as possible.  it's the last year.  i want to come back in the future and travel, but that won't be the same.  i want to experience everything to the fullest, the good and the bad, whatever comes my way.  it all helps me grow. (hopefully.  ~lol~)

people!

today @ kyobo bookstore in gwanghwamun.  taken w/my camera phone.

stress.

so sad. korea & hungary lead the world in suicide rates.  :(  full article here.



chart from the New York Times.

make your own tree

being an expat, and a short-term expat at that, it's just not worth investing in some things. real furniture, for instance. plants. or christmas trees.

but i love christmas.  it's my favorite holiday.  i hate not being home for christmas.  

so, how to enjoy the christmas season in a country where christmas is celebrated more like valentine's day?  (yes.  valentine's day.  here, christmas is a couple's day.  you buy a cake in a fancy box & go out on a date with your partner to a nice western restaurant - often italian. like valentine's day.)

well, step one to enjoying christmas, for me, is to figure out which christmas cookies can be successfully made in the toaster oven & bake 'til my eyes fall out.  

step two is to decorate the apartment without crossing the "it's just not worth investing in some things" line.  

to fulfill this step, the best boyfriend R made us a christmas tree.  a corrugated cardboard christmas tree.

i love it.

we've pulled it out again from last year & are considering covering it with cute korean christmas stickers this year, so it looks like it has more ornaments on it.  haven't decided if that will look cute or tacky.  the stickers may be cute enough to keep tacky at bay.  

anyway, without further rambling, i bring you:

Our Tree.

it looks a little lonely without presents.  i need to get some candy canes, if i can find them, and hang them on the branches.

how to make? 

get a giant box & cut out a tree shape.  trace it & cut out a second, identical shape.  color at will.  (R colored ours with a green board marker.  it took a looooong time. ~lol~)   

cut slits from the bottom up on one piece and from the top down on the other.  make sure they meet each other about 1/3 of the way up from the bottom.

slide the pieces together.

if you happen to buy christmas lights that randomly come with a plastic light-filled star attached, fill the top of your tree with toothpicks and secure the star on your tree.

voila!  your own expat tree.  ~^^ 

i'm getting excited for christmas.  we're going to have our potluck christmas at our apartment again.  

but, i am happy that we'll be home for christmas next year.  it's the last year in korea.